Alyceum

Igniting Leaders, Inspiring Revolutions

Leadership

Use Gratitude to Boost Your Resilience and Leadership

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It’s been shown the act of gratitude can have a significant positive effect on our resilience and also our leadership (not to mention our health, happiness and wellbeing). It can also be trained and increased with practice!

How do we use gratitude practices to increase our sense of wellbeing, resilience and leadership?

1. Make it a ritual to look for the small wins, the tiny micro moments of joy.

Often we will do the opposite and maybe gripe at the end of the day to our partners about the times people annoyed you. Instead, make it a habit to point out to yourself and your loved ones, when things worked out.

LEADERSHIP HABIT: Start or finish a meeting with words of gratitude that you and the team can share with each other.

2. Look for micro moments of connection and make it count.

Increase your wellbeing by making it a game to get a smile out of the people you meet in everyday life. It might be doing something kind for a family member, listening to a colleague, opening the door for a stranger. Look for acts of kindness that you can practice every day and it will increase your own happiness.

LEADERSHIP HABIT: Focus on connecting with teammates. Perhaps it’s remembering a birthday, an unexpected public thank you or a saying good morning when you enter the office.

3. Create a family ritual of gratitude – get your family involved.

Perhaps it’s sharing something that you’re grateful for at the dinner table or before bed time or if you have kids in the car on the way home from school. If it’s a ritual, it will encourage people to think about and look for something to be grateful for during the day.

LEADERSHIP HABIT: Leadership starts at home. Character, integrity and authenticity is not only to be practiced in the office but also at home. In fact, it’s when we are not ‘on’ that it can be the most challenging to practice this but good to reinforce for ourselves.

4. Write it down.

This time of the year, you can use the season to choose one, three or five people who you want to thank this year and let them know what you are grateful for. Of course, you can practice this throughout the year with a thank you card. Or if you really want to level up on this, consider writing a letter to someone in your life that has had a profound effect on your career, family or life.

LEADERSHIP HABIT: Set some time aside weekly or monthly to practice writing words of gratitude to those around you – bonus points for handwritten notes!

5. Take a moment to appreciate the miraculousness of life.

The Greeks would say ‘memento mori’ which means ‘remember that you will die’ and so appreciate the preciousness of life, don’t sweat the small stuff and make every day that you are alive count!

LEADERSHIP HABIT: Let’s bring humanity back into the workplace. Share the personal triumphs within your team as well as the professional ones.

Share your favourite gratitude practices on our Alyceum Facebook page.

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Why we need Greater Good Leadership more than ever?

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This revolution will ask all of us to shift our ways of thinking to connection rather than consumerism, to purpose rather than profits, to sustainability rather than selfishness. We must awaken to see workers not as inputs, the environment not as our personal domain, and shareholders not as all-powerful. And we need to move away from old models of doing what is right for me and assuming it will turn out right for you.”

— Jacqueline Novogratz, Author, A Manifesto for a Moral Revolution

Amongst the pain, destruction, fear and uncertainty, the world is demanding a new form of leadership. Leadership that acts on aspirations beyond personal goals or even beyond the traditional bounds of a business or organisation but instead seeks to work towards the greater good. As a global society, we are facing unprecedented challenges that need solutions outside our current thinking. We need models that stretch our thinking and we need new frameworks to inspire our action.

 

We need leaders who serve the greater good.

First and foremost, Greater Good Leaders serve a purpose beyond themselves. We dare to imagine a future which affords everyone opportunities for safety, growth, choice and dignity. We dare to imagine a future which values the intangibles as much as the tangibles – our environment, human connection and the arts.

Greater Good Leaders take radical responsibility for the challenges in the world. We do not shift to blame others or shirk away from these responsibilities, but we take them on – together with others, with all the vulnerability of not knowing the answers. We live and act with integrity and take on our leadership duties with the greatest sense of honor and responsibility.

Greater Good Leaders hone our strengths and talents to face these challenges and responsibility. We act with humility through always listening, learning and building trust with others. We focus on changing ourselves first – growing our talents as well as understanding of the world. Leadership is not about me – but it is personal. We can only start with me – improve me, transform me – then we can attend to the global transformations we seek.

Now more than ever, we need a moral revolution, a moral compass to guide our leadership. We are yearning for something different – from our political leaders, business leaders and community leaders.

 

Here are 9 reasons we need Greater Good Leadership more than ever

 

1. We want to trust our leaders again

There is an all-time low level of trust in leaders and institutions – from government, politics, business or religious organisations. Trust has been broken and it needs to be repaired.

We want to trust our leaders – we want leaders who have honed their competence to perform their job well, leaders who care deeply and listen to concerns, and who are genuine and sincere in their words, actions and decisions. We’ve over leaders talking one way and acting another – you lose all respect, trust and credibility.

 

2. We want leaders who are ethical

An individual has not started living until they can rise above the narrow confines of their individualistic concerns to the broad concerns of all humanity”

— Jeff Klein, Author, Working for Good

Great success, profits and power can’t be at the expense of people or the community as a whole. Unfortunately, we see leaders who are willing to overlook wrongdoing if it benefits their success. Greater Good Leaders view performances within the lens of ethics, asking what has been the means to create this success.

Being ethical in your decision making and actions is core to greater good leadership. Being a person of integrity, honoring your word and doing the right thing even when no one is watching.

We want leaders who walk the talk who are inspiring people who lead by example. Our actions matter more than our words. Every day we show our values through our words, actions and decisions – what are you communicating through your behaviours today? Greater Good Leaders are cognisant of the values that drive our behaviours and work hard to ensure we are reflecting our values clearly.

 

3. We want leaders who take responsibility

Making the choice to take full responsibility is the foundation of true personal and relational transformation”

— The 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership

Leaders who blame and shame others for the problems we face are tiring. We seek leaders who take responsibility – radical 100% responsibility. These leaders understand they may not have created the problems but they will definitely not be part in continuing them. We must be accountable for our words and actions and openly acknowledge our mistakes when they occur. We are all human. We are all learners.

 

4. We want leaders with true vision and imagination

What does following in the footsteps of everyone else get you? It gets you to exactly the same conclusions as everyone else.”
—  Ryan Holiday

The goal posts have moved – we want goals and ambitions, vision and futures with less greed, corruption, pollution and poverty and more wellbeing, connection, ethics and dignity. We need to inspire long term thinking, audacious goals as well as small incremental change. We ought to encourage leaders to dream of what could be – looking for solutions which are inclusive and sustainable. We need leaders who are willing to challenge the status quo and with that the traditional powers.

 

5. We want leaders who display courage

People see the injustice in the world. We want change. We see the discrimination, greed and corruption, and we need to see these injustices brought to justice. Otherwise we lose confidence in our democracy.

This takes true courage – the ability to face discomfort and be brave to work towards the greater good. Courage means using your voice, standing up for what you believe in, seeing things from different perspectives and working together with others.

 

6. We need more than a strong man – we need diversity

We’ve seen a resurgence of a ‘strong man leadership’ with global leaders exhibiting tough guy, hyper-masculine toxicity. We’ve also seen the world see the race discrimination that still infilitrates our structures, norms and behaviours. One man, race or country does not have all the answers to solve the complex problems of the world. We need now more than ever, a diverse collective to overcome the challenges we face. We must embrace diversity in all its forms, be willing to listen and learn, and seek conversations for understanding.

This is love work. Love is one of those words that is hard to define. But in the context of this work, here is what it means to me: It means you do this work because you believe in something greater than your own self-gain. It means you do this work because you believe that every human being deserves dignity, freedom, and equality. It means you do this work because you desire wholeness for yourself and the world. It means you do this work because you want to become a good ancestor. It means you do this work because love is not a verb to you but an action. It means you do this work because you no longer want to intentionally or unintentionally harm BIPOC”

— Layla Saad, Author, Me and White Supremacy: How to Recognise Your Privilege, Combat Racism and Change the World

7. We value more than just the bottom line

We can no longer afford false divisions between work and community, between ethics and economics. But how can we change from a system which values endless increasing profit and materialism to one in which the core values are community, caring for the environment, creating, growing things and personal development? We empower people. There aren’t many motivating forces more potent than giving your staff an opportunity to exercise and express their idealism”.

— Anita Roddick, Founder, The Body Shop and Author, Business as Unusual

There is more to the world than profits. We need meaning, we need well-being, we need connection, we need a clean and enduring environment. These goals don’t even need to be in opposition to money and growth but we need to re-imagine it’s relationship. Conscious capitalism is re-envisioning what could be and it’s the way of the future.

 

8. We want vulnerability from our leaders

Our ability to be daring leaders will never be greater than our capacity for vulnerability”

— Brene Brown, Researcher and Author, Dare to Lead

Greater Good Leadership requires vulnerability. We don’t know all the answers and we can’t be perfect. Brené Brown describes vulnerability as “uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure.” It’s that unstable feeling we get when we step out of our comfort zone or do something that we can’t control the outcome. Greater Good leaders commit to showing up and doing the work anyway.

 

9. We want leaders who work for our most disadvantaged

Greater Good leaders are characterised not by what they get (power, fame, fortune) but what they give. They put themselves last – they serve others first. They are working beyond their own self interest and instead have a genuine concern for others. They put themselves in other people’s shoes. They listen and work together with people. Do you give more to the world than what you take?

 

We are the leaders we desire…

Greater Good Leaders are not out there waiting to be discovered. We need to be the leaders we desire. In these challenging times, we must not seek outside, we must seek inside ourselves to grow into the best leaders we can be in this moment in history. To improve ourselves so together we can improve the world around us.

 

Want to join the Greater Good Collective? Launching 1 March

On 1 March, I’m launching the Greater Good Collective, a 3 month personal leadership journey to live and lead courageously to create a better world.

Check it out here to join us.
 

 

 

Our Annual Review for Alyceum in 2020

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2020 was the year no one expected.  It highlighted so many of the pleasures we take for granted, stretched us to find new delights in ordinary moments and be reminded of what is truly important to us – family, relationships, health, nature and movement.

It showed us the importance of community and connection, resilience and adaptability, and the robust leadership required amidst uncertainty.  This year highlighted just how interconnected we are as a global society and how our community ecosystem is only as strong as our most vulnerable counterparts. So yes, this year looked and felt very different than past years both personally and in the business.

Looking back

2020 was a year to look back for me – it’s been 25 years since I went to the first UN International Children’s Conference in England with 800 kids from 90 different countries. This experience for me was truly life changing and set my life on a very different trajectory than it was before.

We celebrated the anniversary of the UK conference which was the first in its aim to gather children from around the world to learn about and voice their concerns on the state of the environment as well as to showcase their environmental initiatives.  And then also the birth of Millennium Kids, now 25 years old, helping kids tackle the biggest issues on our planet.

A big shout out to my friend and mentor, Catrina Aniere.  She was the teacher who supported four of us kids to start the first Kids Helping Kids conference in 1996 and she has been there every step of the way in building Millennium Kids for the last 25 years supporting kids to have a voice, work together, be inventive and create the change they want to see in their community.  An incredible community leader, teacher and supporter of kids all over the world!

Lighting the fire

20 years ago, I graduated from high school and ran as a torchbearer for the Sydney Olympics.  It was an honour to be a torchbearer and play a small part in this global legacy. As the Olympics was postponed this year due to COVID-19, it reminded me to be grateful for the opportunities to bring humanity together as one and not take it for granted. Over the years, I’ve been so fortunate to attend many international conferences and events bringing people from all over the world together.  Through technology, we have the world at our fingertips, but do we go out and explore other countries, cultures and people enough?  I think there is the opportunity for more, to build our empathy and understanding, especially in the divisive global times we are living in.

Constraints spur creativity

Constraints are often seen as a negative, but constraints can make you more creative.  We all set common constraints in our lives without even realising it – work from 9 – 5, Monday – Friday for 46 weeks of the year, for example. This was the year of new constraints – no national or overseas travel, work completely from home, no face to face meetings to name a few. Within these constraints, new innovations were born, from health to the arts to business.  Everyone had to innovate.   People began to redesign their work and lives according to what was truly important to them!

My year kicked off with the Emerging Leaders in Governance program.  We had an incredible group come together.  We were very fortunate to start the program as normal with workshops, site visits and a weekend retreat.  Then halfway through the program, we changed to fully online delivery.  Evening workshops, panel discussions, even our graduation was online.   The participants were absolute troopers!  Not only were they dealing with the challenges of a global pandemic and how this affected them work-wise and personally, they maintained their commitment to the program.  When we couldn’t meet face to face, we met online, we had phone chats and kept in contact over messenger and email. We supported each other with information, connection and empathy.

One of the most exciting online events of me this year was to curate and facilitate the Engaging Young Leaders on Aged Care and Community Boards program’s Unconvention with an international line of guest experts based in India, Singapore, Sydney, Bendigo and Perth.  For two hours we talked about the importance of relationships in the boardroom. We could never have engaged these leaders to come to Perth but to be able to tap into their perspectives and expertise was a true delight.

You can read the program’s Annual Report here.

 

Just before Lockdown

In March, just before the closing down of many workplaces, schools and community, I was very fortunate to be recognised as one of 15 incredible women being inducted into the WA Women’s Hall of Fame.  I appreciated the nomination from the very thoughtful ladies from the Soroptimist club of South Perth, who have been amazing members and supporters of 100 Women for many years now.  The WA Women’s Hall of Fame has the simple vision of recognising, promoting and celebrating women in Western Australia.  The stories of the women who were recognised were nothing short of incredible. I felt honoured to be included and it was a special moment to have my daughter there with me at Government House, and to reflect on all the wonderful women I have in my life.

Photos from the Hall of Fame event

Global Conversations

100 Women, like most organisations, revised our plans for the year – we were asking ourselves, how long would we be in lockdown, what impact would COVID have on women both across Australia and globally, and what role could we play to champion women in this environment.  We revised our grants program for this year and took our events online.

I was honoured to facilitate three online events for 100 Women, our first one brought together financial experts to bring information to women about how to approach their finances during a crisis. Our second conversation was with one of Australia’s leading journalists and authors, Madonna King. Her latest books exploring the experience of being a teenage girl in Australia are eye-opening and much needed research and discussion.  Our third event was with the incredible Elizabeth Broderick who is Special Rapporteur at the UN Human Rights Council. To hear how COVID was affecting women around the world and her experiences working for change was nothing less than inspiring.

By October, we were so lucky in Perth to have the opportunity to come together in person for our Gala celebration in October and grant $100,000 to 5 organisations including Earbus, Shooting Stars, Cambodian Children’s Fund, One Girl and Bower Reuse & Repair Centre.  It was incredible to hear how these organisations were managing, reacting and innovating to the challenges of this year.  Thank you to our whole 100 Women team who are so committed to growing our work and impact including our new Chair, Virginia Miltrup!

 

On a personal note

So even though 2020 was not the year I had planned and very different from previous years in 2019 and 2018. This year, ironically, I got the chance to take a few more little holidays (locally in WA) with my kids who are growing up so quickly. I’ve intentionally spent time redesigning little areas of my home to facilitate the space and conversations I want to have with my husband and kids – a photo board to savor memories, a games basket in the lounge to facilitate family games night.  After reading The Power of Ritual I’ve been playing around with weekly, monthly and annual rituals to increase our connection as a family and what’s important to us.

When COVID shut down all the events, my daughter was fortunate to start guitar lessons to Ezereve, a hugely talented singer/songwriter (100 Women member and philanthropist in her own right) and even though her diary got busier and busier through the year when events returned, she kept teaching my daughter each week – bringing music into the house!  Thank you Ezereve for your time and talents!

We also lost a dear friend of ours. Helen Fairnie was a trailblazer. She was among the first female vets in Australia and the first female president of the Australian Veterinary Association among a huge list of other achievements – an Order of Australia (AM), authoring a book on female vets in Australia, a doctorate, a committed lifelong community volunteer to many causes including SAVE African Rhino Foundation and Rotary, plus was a loving wife and mother to two kids. She was a huge supporter of my ideas.  In 2012 joined the committee that established 100 Women and on the first grants committee too. In fact, she was one of the first people I talked to about the idea of 100 Women. She was a huge encourager of me and 100 Women from the very beginning.  I’ll never forget Helen’s laugh, big smile, care for all living creatures and her determined spirit.

So that was the year that was!  2021 looks like the phoenix rising with many new plans in the pipeline including the launch of a new online leadership program! (send me an email if you’re keen to hear more).  I encourage you to take time to reflect on your year and plan for the next 10!  Our lives are what we make of it!

 

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10 key questions to fuel your reflection in 2021

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The year 2020… How will you remember this year? What stories will you tell yourself and others about it? What will you emphasize in your memories and what will you skip over?

It’s been a strange and uncertain year for us all. It’s tested our resilience and made us grateful for the life we’ve been able to lead for so many years. Not only has the global pandemic tested our resolve, we are facing some challenging societal issues that we need to address; a racial reckoning as well as the importance of character in leadership and politics, and more broadly. Now that’s a lot to reflect on!


Connection and Reflection

It can be all too easy to skip over the experiences of the last 12 months like a bad dream to be left behind quickly. In fact, we can only truly learn from the experience if we take the time to reflect and understand what we’ve learnt and use these reflections to try something different as a result of the experience. Reflection can be a powerful learning tool to ignite your self-awareness, relationships and leadership. Better yet, it’s absolutely free to do, and your reflections get better with practice.

I’ve made it simple for you and created a list of questions you can send to your friends below. Or better yet, make up your own list of questions to explore! Let’s face it, our reflections to these questions might look very different this year than in previous years.

Here we go… 10 key questions to fuel your end of year reflection.

 

1. What did you miss the most this year?

Ok, let’s have a place to mourn. What did you truly miss that you didn’t get to do this year? It might have been as big as global travel plans or as small as dinner with friends and family. What parts of life did you miss the most with the challenges of this year?

 

2. What triggered negative thoughts and emotions in you the most this year?

First, think of the challenging feelings you had this year; grief, sadness, anger, jealously or loneliness, perhaps.  Researchers suggest identifying the emotions we experience is the first step to manage them better. So what were the feelings that came up for you this year?

Now think if there were any themes or patterns with what prompted those feelings? Loss of control, lack of certainty or close quarters with people?

Be real and honest with yourself. Often we think of the negative times in our lives but we don’t think about what triggered it!

 

3. What did you gain this year?

Even with all the changes and uncertainty, what did you gain? What were the silver linings?

Think about those negative triggers above, could you bring some reframing to it – how has it made you a better person, how did you grow and what did you learn? If it’s still tough to revisit, perhaps it’s time to gather a new meaning about the experience.

 

4. What new insights do you have about yourself?

What stretched and challenged you the most this year? What did you learn about yourself this year?

Instead of sailing into the new year without fully gaining the benefit of all your experiences this year, consider the three main things that you’ve learnt about yourself. What did you set out to learn and improve on during the year? Where can you see you improved from last year?

Where have you grown the most as a person, leader, family member or friend? Were these intended learning curves or a by-product of circumstance? Either way, we can take each experience to the next level by reflecting on what we learnt.

 

5. What is important in maintaining a strong sense of mental wellbeing?

When we were dealing with challenging situations this year, it also highlighted the importance of our mental wellbeing.

What did you rely on to help you through this year? Exercise, connection, reading, meditation, healthy food or music. We had to be creative. There was definitely some constraints – perhaps your gym closed down, you couldn’t leave your house or visit your friends! So what did you do?

Your mental health is important, not just in a pandemic. How many of these practices can you retain as part of your normal routine?

 

6. What did you realise is most important to you in your life?

What do you truly need to be happy and fulfilled in life?

It is so easy to get caught up in what everyone else wants you to do – your family, friends, work or even society, in general, can dictate what we focus on.

Think about when you get into work every day, do you reflect on your key priorities and set in for some deep, deliberative work or do you check your email and focus on what others want of you? Let’s get more intentional about how you want to spend your time.

Personally – did you get to focus on what was important to you this year or did you get pulled in different directions? What is fundamentally important to you and how do you ensure it stays the priority for you?

7. What are you grateful for?

Time to evoke a little gratitude. Make a list and check it twice!

Gratitude has immeasurable benefits to your physical and mental health. It improves your relationships, increases your resilience, helps you sleep better, improves your self-esteem and, not to mention, it makes you happier!

From the huge big things to the tiniest little things. What are you grateful for? If it involved people around you, this might be a nice way to reconnect with people during December and tell them what made you grateful too!

8. What has made you proud this year?

What behaviours or situations have made you proud? Perhaps where you have truly lived your values? Perhaps it was how you survived a tough experience, or maybe it’s how you supported others through the tough times this year?

Feelings of pride can include feeling satisfied, joyful, delighted or fulfilled. This year, it might be about the small moments that have made you proud or content. Think about your relationships, goals or simply your attitude.

9. How did you foster connection and relationships?

Family and friends, business colleagues and community – relationships can play a key part of your wellbeing and also your success.

It was definitely made a little harder this year, so how did you overcome this? Which relationships made you feel strong and empowered? How did you intentionally foster the relationships in your life? Are you hanging around the right people? Are they lifting you up to be your best? How has your presence positively impacted on the people around you too?

10. What change of routine happened in 2020 that you are going to keep long term?

Looking forward, what are you going to keep?! I love a good experiment! Whether it’s working from home or hiking on weekends!

2020 was the year of experimentation – what would life look like if we worked from home? What if we didn’t travel nationally or internationally for the next 1-2 years? What if we participated in events and conferences online?  What if we had to run our business or develop our careers in a different way?  What if…?

We can always try new habits and rituals to enhance life meaning and wellbeing.

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Take some time this December…

Grab your favourite drink, put on some encouraging music and sit in your favourite chair or go outside into nature and answer these questions for yourself!? Then come together with friends and share your reflections from the year.

Get this Free Guide: 6 POWERFUL SECRETS TO FIND YOUR HIGHEST PURPOSE IN LIFE

The world needs more purpose-driven people. But where do you start?

This inspiring guide will give you powerful insights to find and refine your own purpose in life.
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Top 10 Books for 2020

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I believe in the transformative effects of books. Personally I’ve witnessed how a book can inspire a different perspective and move me to action. Are you making the most from the incredible knowledge we have at our fingertips?

Which books to read?

I’m an avid reader and yet, I still feel there is not enough time in the day to read as many books as I want.  So I have to be discerning with the books I read. I look closely for recommendations and I don’t stay around for long with books that don’t capture my attention.  Yes, often I’m dipping in and out of books too for the info I’m craving at that moment. I try to search for a range of books and throw fiction books into the mix too (although most of these recommendations are non fiction).

It’s like a fireside chat with an incredible mentor…

I love non-fiction books as it feels like you are getting personal mentoring from leaders from every part of the globe hearing about their research, influences, perspectives and ideas.  What a wonderful pleasure to be able to access their thinking and ideas.  Some are leadership focused and others are focused on mindset, personal transformation and rituals.

My top 10 book for 2020

Ok, so here are the parameters, I’ve limited this list to books that have come out in 2019 or 2020, not books that I’ve discovered that have been published before then (because that would be an even longer list). I’ve also tried very hard to keep it just to 10!

So within those constraints here are my favourite books for 2020.

Disclosure: This blog contains affiliate links.  I hope you enjoy the books that inspire me!

My first among equals pick goes to…

1. Manifesto for a Moral Revolution by Jacqueline Novogratz


How I would really love a real fireside chat with Jacqueline Novogratz!

Jacqueline Novogratz is a true pioneer of our times.  She is the founder of Acumen, a global community of socially and environmentally responsible partners dedicated to changing the way the world tackles poverty.  Wow – what an incredible aim!

How did she do it? She shares her own life journey in this book as well as many of the changemakers that Acumen has invested in over the years and I absolutely delighted in learning from her and their experiences.  It’s the type of book that inspires you to do better, think bigger and keep trying.

This is a super wise read. Her insight into creating systems change to empower our most disadvantaged fellow human beings brings to light just how important human dignity is.

If you are looking for leadership ideas and strategies to do good in the world, this book is an absolute MUST!

2. The Power of Ritual: Turning Everyday Activities Into Soulful Practices by Casper ter Kuile 


This was such a captivating read.

Author, Casper ter Kuile is a thoughtful and entertaining writer. This book is light yet deep.  It explores how we can add layers of meaning and connection into our lives which is suffering from disconnection, loneliness and ….  He explores how you can transform your daily habits into practices that create a sacred foundation for your life.  He explores four areas of connection – to self, to others, to the natural world and with the transcendent.

Casper has an intriguing background; he is a Ministry Innovation Fellow at Harvard Divinity School after growing up in a secular family in England!  He co-authored a white paper called How We Gather which explores the ways we come together in the modern world for life long endeavours to build community, seek purpose, be accountable and serve others.

3. Untamed by Glennon Doyle


This is the book we all needed in 2020. Glennon has such a down to earth tone about her that makes her reading accessible to everyone.

This book encourages us all to really trust our inner voice and stop adhering to the expectations of everyone else. Who would you be if you had full permission to truly live the life you want?  This book is a wake up – dig beyond your social conditioning and live life according to your rules.

With so many memorable metaphors that instantly become part of your vocabulary…you’re a cheetah and we can do hard things! This is the first book I’ve read of Glennon’s memoir series and I really enjoyed it.

4. Big Friendship by Aminatou Sow and Ann Friedman


Often when we explore relationships we are mostly talking about intimate relationships, family relationships or work relationships.  This book explores friendships!

Our close friendships can mean so much in our life but rarely do we delve into how we can foster these relationships over a long time. How do you overcome different life stages, geographic moves and more generally the ups and downs of life.

I loved reading this part-memoir of the author’s own friendship together, exploring the history of friendships and how we can make the most of our friendships in our lives.  It brought to my attention just how important these relationships are in my own life and how I can cultivate them more mindfully.  To all my big friends – thank you!

5. Be Fearless by Jean Case


Jean Case is the CEO of the Case Foundation (a philanthropic foundation supporting social entrepreneurs driving change) and also the first female Chairwoman of National Geographic Society in its 131 year history.

She shares her incredible experience working as and with changemakers, compiling the approaches and strategies to be fearless in your approach in transformational change.

I love the stories she shares, both of incredible changemakers from around the world as well as her own stories of how she lives her life.

6. Me and White Supremacy: How to Recognise Your Privilege, Combat Racism and Change the World by Layla Saad


This is a truly brilliant book.

I first came across Layla a few years ago following the conversations about race globally especially when her work was confronting white educators. This piqued my interest as a facilitator of programs working with people from diverse cultures and backgrounds including people of colour.

I love how she has set out this book as a 28-day challenge.  Make no mistake, each day is deeply confronting work, but this is the work we must do to overcome the white supremacy. White supremacy work is not just for unhinged fringe groups, everyday people like you and me must commit to it and share our part in a system we were born into to ensure we don’t continue it.

I love how Layla shares that she wrote this book to be a good ancestor  (how wise is this?!) and by reading this book, you do your part in being a good ancestor too.

7. Thriving Mind: How to cultivate a good life by Dr Jenny Brockis


This is the book we truly needed this year and that was even before COVID hit!

Now more than ever we need to focus on how to thrive in our modern life and Jenny has lots of practical strategies – backed by evidence based research – to help us do that. This book speaks directly to the challenges of modern living, loneliness, stress, lack of connection and mental health.

She writes about happiness and engaging all of our emotions, enhancing our energy, mood and resilience as well as harnessing the powers of connection and relationships.  I am really lucky to call Jenny a friend in real life and she is the real deal!

8. Humour, Seriously: Why humour is a superpower at work and in life by Jennifer Aaker and Naomi Bagdonas


Both these authors are so interesting in their fields of study that I’m surprised I hadn’t come across them before.  Dr Jennifer Aaker is a behavioural psychologist, and Professor at Stanford Graduate School of Business, teaching courses on innovation, the power of storytelling and purpose. Naomi Bagdonas is a Stanford lecturer and a professionally trained comedian. She has designed and facilitated innovation workshops for the boards and leadership teams of Fortune 100 companies.

We have also experienced how humour can shift the feeling in different situations – make us relax, be vulnerable or make down barriers. Yet, this book really explores how it can be useful in a business context. Given our businesses are moving into the age of creating an experience for the customer (and our employees), I enjoyed being stretched to think about how I can use humour more. Full disclosure – I’m not the funniest person around but I definitely enjoy hanging with funny people.  This book really breaks it up and gives easy ways to start thinking and seeing the world in a humorous way!

9. Becoming by Michelle Obama


This memoir is pure delight to read.

Like many people, I adore how Michelle carries herself, standing as a role model in society.  It’s her character, her empathy, her intelligence and her ability that draws people to her.  It was a privilege to read more about her journey. Very inspiring.

This has been out for a little while now and it certainly is a chunky book, but beautiful stories that will lift your spirits for sure.

10. City of Girls by Elizabeth Gilbert


I want to finish my list with a fiction novel. I believe fiction can be just as insightful as non fiction. Just like my non fiction favourites, there have been novels I’ve read, seemingly just at the right time, that have changed my outlook on life.

I did get a chance to read a few novels this year including this absolutely superb book by Elizabeth Gilbert.  (Side note – Reese Witherspoon has a great online book club recommending mostly novels each month – check it out)  Being a theatre lover, I was in awe of the depth of research and understanding used to bring to life in a thoroughly entertaining way.  I love the themes and questions that she exposes in this book; the role and place of a woman, women’s sexuality and how we respond differently to men and women.

The characters and how they live their lives can definitely be confronting to the reader even 80 years after the period we are reading about!

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Of course, these were just my absolute favourites!  Something in me makes this such a hard blog post to publish because there are always so many other books worth reading and mentioning…RBG, David Attenborough, Barack Obama, Julia Gillard to name just a few. Maybe I’ll set different parameters next time and share my favourites within particular subjects such as leadership or diversity in the future.

An important realisation

You know, when you start to collate all the books you are reading and have read, you start to get an understanding of which voices you are listening to and perhaps, more importantly, which voices you aren’t hearing. I definitely like to read female stories and perspectives as well as perspectives that are going to challenge my point of view on the world. Looking at my own list, I’m keen to read some more Aboriginal authors in 2021 and found this fantastic list which will help me guide my choices!

Well that’s it for now. I would love to hear your top reads for 2020 too!

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How to use your influence for good

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Most change-makers I know are keen to have a positive impact on the world in some way. Traditionally you may have had to be a Prime Minister or wealthy CEO to influence and impact the world.

But the world has changed! You don’t need to be in a position of authority to have the power to positively influence those around you. Tools such as the internet have levelled the playing field and allowed everyday people to have a voice, gather people together for a cause and create momentum. Think about Malala Yousafzai or the #Metoo movement.

What types of power increase your influence?

Social psychologists John French and Bertram Raven discovered that there are six types of influential power and, of those, there are two that everyone has the ability to harness regardless of their standing.

1. Expert Power – Having advanced levels of knowledge about a subject gives you power because people trust you as an expert in your subject area and look to you for guidance. Develop this power by taking courses, reading, attending conferences, finding mentors who challenge your assumptions and constantly stretch your knowledge and understanding.

2. Referent Power – This is the type of power that people wield when they are well-liked and respected. You have this power if you are well-known in your community. Earn this power by always leading with integrity, doing good work, building strong relationships and take bold actions.

As change-makers, we can work on developing these powers to influence our workplaces or communities. Challenge yourself to lead not through position, fear or demands but through something which is far stronger than these – shared values!

Shared values are guiding beliefs that groups and organisations rally around to inspire change and keep people committed to their causes. These are beliefs that excite, guide people’s actions and help define identities. Most importantly, they’re the emotionally-charged fuel that enables leaders to influence their followers.

Tap into Emotions and Get Personal

According to Harvard Business researcher Dr. John P. Kotter, most people fail to be influential because they try to influence others using logic, convinced that facts will make others listen to them.

However, research shows emotional appeals can be more persuasive. This is because the same part of your brain that you use to make decisions also controls emotions, causing the two to be intertwined. If you want to influence people to take action or adopt new ideas, you can’t just tell them why they should do it; you have to make them feel it. So, basically, how you make people feel will impact your ability to influence and make change.

How do you make people feel?

Consider these avenues of power you can exert everyday

1. Speak up – consider how you communicate with those who you know, including your family, friends and colleagues. Can you raise awareness about an issue? Can you support an event through sharing it? Consider the ways you can share more – perhaps on social media, in your workplace or just with your friends.

2. Share your expertise – can you use your knowledge, networks and expertise to support a cause by sitting on a community organisation board?

3. Consumer power – every time you purchase something, you are supporting it. Choose carefully and support business and brands that contribute something to the world.

4. Philanthropy – philanthropy is just a fancy word for carefully considering how to give funds (or time) to have a positive impact in the world. You don’t have to be rich and famous to make a donation. Just start with a small goal of thoughtfully giving 1% of your earnings this year.

5. Resources – what resources do you have at your disposal? Can you influence your workplace to support a charity, offer a space to an event or meeting or use your profile to help build momentum for a cause?

I really do believe that people just don’t know how influential they can be. We have everything at our fingertips – access to knowledge, access to platforms to have a say, access to resources.

Don’t Forget!

In a Harvard Business Review article, Ben Laker and Charmi Patel outline a number of ways that you can increase your influence with one on one.

1. Build rapport – building rapport with the people that you want to influence will strengthen the interpersonal connections and trust that you have with them. Get to know people, dig a little deeper then you usually would – find out their purpose and passions in life, consider how you can support them.

2. Be an active listener – influencing isn’t just about telling people what to do or buy, it’s about understanding what will make them want to do these things. To learn this, you must first listen to them, understand what their motivations are and be empathetic about what they tell you. Practice asking good questions and listening.

3. Be focused and set an example – you can’t influence someone to change if you have not made that change yourself. Often I’ve found this is the best way to influence. Great influence comes from sharing your own experiences, and showing someone that the change you made could be great for them too.

The real question is: Are you ready to step up?

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The world needs more purpose-driven people. But where do you start?

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