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Five strategies to help set goals in 2022

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Are you a person who sets goals in December or January for the year? How are you feeling this new year?  Did you take some time to reflect on the past year?  Perhaps use these reflection prompts here.

It’s fair to say that the planning for 2021 and 2022 is very different from past years.  The abounding uncertainty can take a toll on setting goals. If we thought last year was difficult, it really hasn’t gotten much easier this year, and then, you start to think, well, is 2023 going to be much different again, either?  Which has made me very curious about how to best plan and set personal and professional goals during this time.

So what are the options?

  • Do you set no goals at all?  How can you predict what’s around the corner?
    Do you set goals but give yourself a lot of slack or leeway given the uncertainty and wildly changing circumstances?   Do you think about alternate plans or just be okay to push out timelines?
  • Or do you push ahead and set goals as usual despite the circumstances around you?

Here are five points to consider when setting goals for this year.

1. Who do you want to be rather than what you want to do

The pandemic has been a huge circuit breaker for many. It has allowed many of us to think about what we are doing with our lives, what’s important to us and how we spend our time. Are we focused on what truly matters in life?

If you’re reading this blog post, then you are probably amongst the luckiest people in the world. We are lucky to spend our lives with purpose and intention. These years can be used to be reflective. Asking yourself – What is my purpose? What are my values? What are my strengths and how do I want to use them in the world?

Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort but where he stands at times of challenge and discovery.” Adversity has the power to shape us in powerful ways.

Introspection and reflection takes time. It takes time to join the dots, make the connections and see the patterns in your own motivations and behaviours. You could use the time to touch base with others and ask them what they have observed in you. You could use the time to go into nature and use awe and wonder to help you reflect. Even if you take the next 1, 2 or 3 years to take the time to truly reflect on these questions, it could set you up so much better for the next 10 – 20 years.

2. Focus on learning

How good a learner are you? No, really. Are you open to learning or have you closed down from it?

One of the best skills we can develop is our ability to learn. The World Economic Forum suggests that over 50% of the current workforce will require reskilling by 2025. That’s incredible.

We all have to be open to learning new skills. We all have to be open to using new tools, apps, and ways of being. With all the predictions of how the workplace will change over the next decade, our ability to learn, unlearn and relearn is vital. Sometimes, you can think you are a good learner but really how good are you?

What’s the quality of questions you ask? Do you tend to jump to advice, or do you ask questions first? How often do you hold on too tightly to an idea or perspective and not be willing to see it from another angle?

So what can you focus on learning this year? A new language, professional skills or what can you learn from another industry? Don’t be afraid to focus on personal skills as well as professional ones. Maybe this year is the year to take up art or pottery. These hobbies give us space to get away from the pandemic or the stresses of our job and learn something new.

3. What can you control in this situation

Uncertainty shows the lack of control in our lives. It reminds me of parenthood! You realise your life is not your own anymore and you are at the mercy of external forces that can change your day in an instance. The pandemic is like this too. You dream. You make plans and then the plans need changing. Though, even in the toughest of situations, we can practice how we choose to respond to it.

Yes, you might not have the ability to control your life as you have done in the past. But what do you have control over? At the very least, you have the freedom to choose your attitude. As Viktor Frankl says in A Man’s Search for Meaning, “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing; the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”

Often with goal setting, you can focus on the outcome that you wish for rather than the journey it takes to achieve it. When outcomes are so unpredictable at the moment, rather than focusing on the end result, focus on the habits to get to the result and derive the sense of achievement by doing it repeatedly.

Want to be a better leader? Focus on the behaviours of exceptional leaders. Practice your long term or strategic thinking. Share positive feedback with teammates on a regular basis. Practice running effective and energising meetings (what does this look like practically?). Focus on conversations with your teammates. What behaviours can you practice that will make you a better leader?

4. Reap the richness in your relationships

So much of what we can achieve as leaders and change makers are a result of the relationships you cultivate. Both personally and professionally. Take the time to cultivate these relationships. Can’t meet in person? Give people a call! Chat to someone different for 10 minutes a day to check, see how they are going and see what their plans are for this year.

The pandemic also has allowed us to focus on our personal relationships – with our partner, our kids, our parents and friends. A great book is Clayton Christenson’s How will You Measure your Life? which challenges you to think deeply about the metrics of success that are important to you. One, in particular, that he talks about is relationships with our family. If we want long term fulfilling relationships with our family, we have to have strong boundaries to safeguard them. That means time, attention and effort. It’s showing up repeatedly. Nobody’s going to give you an award for this, but in 20 years time you will still be married and your kids will like you! I always remember a quote by Dr Fiona Wood, who said “Save the best of you for those who love you the most”.

Show up for your relationships this year. Have you blocked time out in the diary for family dinners, team lunches, holidays or team retreats? Do it now! Now you have the opportunity to carve out the year that you want!

5. Our health is our wealth

The pandemic has also brought into focus the privilege of our health. Like our relationships, our health needs constant attention. What habits can you embed to improve your health this year? Tony Schwartz and Jame Loehr in The Power of Full Engagement talk about four energy sources: physical, emotional, mental and spiritual.

They suggest:

  • Physical capacity is defined by the quantity of energy.
  • Emotional capacity is defined by quality of energy.
  • Mental capacity is defined by focus of energy.
  • Spiritual capacity is defined by force of energy.

Consider these four energy sources and how you can create rituals to build these in your life.

Feeling tired? Perhaps focus on managing your physical energy through your breathing, eating, sleeping, and exercise.

Feeling unhappy? Consider what brings you pleasant and positive emotions such as enjoyment, challenge, adventure and opportunity.

Feeling unfocused? Be attentive to where your current focus is, limit distractions (news, devices, tv/entertainment) and spend time getting clear on what’s important to you.

Feeling uninterested or not passionate about life? Step back and define your values and a purpose bigger than yourself. A greater purpose unlocks an incredible force of energy to tap into in life!

Time to set some different goals?

Don’t be afraid to set goals this year, knowing full well they may look different to before. Hold them lightly and approach them with playfulness. Expect that there will be challenges and changes along the way. Don’t see it as a failure but be curious and willing to change and adapt.

Happy goal setting!

 

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The world needs more purpose-driven people. But where do you start? This inspiring guide will give you powerful insights to find and refine your own purpose in life.
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How to be a change maker

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“All of us are needed for a moral revolution.  It doesn’t matter where you live, the size of your bank account, or what you do for a living.  The world needs you to flex, to stretch to uncomfortable levels, to build your moral imagination, to listen more deeply, to reckon with your sense of identity, and to open yourself up to understand the layered inconsistencies and differing perspectives of others.  It requires each of us to partner better, to tell stories that matter and embrace the beautiful struggle.”
– Jacqueline Novogratz

I definitely know that I am at my happiest when I’m working with a team of people to make the world just a little better in some way. I love new ideas and I love a project that challenges that status quo. I love inspiring others to think about the change we can make together.

Last year – 2020 – commemorates 25 years since the start of my journey in leadership and community change making. Back in 1995, I was 12 years old, I was given a beautiful gift. I was chosen to attend the first International Children’s Conference (ICC) on the Environment run by the United Nations. 800 kids from 90 different countries were chosen to attend and experience 3 days of speakers, workshop and kinship.

There is no doubt in my mind that this conference was an immense catalyst in my life and one that I feel very fortunate to have. At 12 years old, my attention was diverted away, absorbed by my own teenage life and focused on others, my local community and world.

At this conference, I connected with the three other Perth delegates and we came back to Perth and formed our own group. Supported by our parents and a supportive teacher, we decided to run our own kids conference! This was probably one of the first examples of the ‘youth-led’ movement. It took us 13 months and in 1996, we ran the first Kids Helping Kids conference with 150 kids from around Western Australia and our ICC friends from Malaysia. In 1999, the group became incorporated as Millennium Kids and still runs today.

Since 1995, I have been a keen volunteer, a change maker and voice for the issues that matter. I look back with huge gratitude for the experiences I had, the people I met and most importantly, the mindset that was formed. It was a mindset that change can happen, we can achieve great things in our community when we come together and we have more power and influence than we think!

So in this post, I want to share 7 lessons I’ve learnt about creating change!

1. Lead now

“Leader is not a title that the world gives to you—it’s an offering that you give to the world.”
– Abby Wambach, two-time Olympic gold medalist and FIFA Women’s World Cup champion

You can lead right where you are – with your knowledge, experience, ideas and passion!

Don’t wait to be asked, don’t wait until you’re old enough or experienced enough. Get in there, join the team, shadow the leader, meet new people, share your ideas – start learning on the job! We all have the capacity to lead change – to make the world a little bit better than how we found it.

You have to be willing to be brave and give ideas a go, put yourself out there, make mistakes, learn and realise you have some value to give to the world.

2. Don’t doubt the crazy ideas!

“The day before something is a breakthrough, it’s a crazy idea.”
– Peter Diamandis, author and founder, Singularity University

It’s often the crazy ideas that can make the biggest difference!

Kids running their own conferences, young people being board directors on aged care organisations, everyday people joining together to become philanthropists…all of these crazy ideas became successful projects. Many people scoffed at these ideas and took a lot of convincing of their worth. Hang in there, it gets a little easier!

Give yourself time for thinking and talking about crazy ideas too. We can all too often get caught up in the busyness of life. Give yourself time to really think about what the world most needs now.

3. Diversify your network

“Inclusion is not a matter of political correctness. It is the key to growth.” 
– Jesse Jackson, Politician and Civil Rights Activist

Get out and make as wide networks as you can.  A broad network is an advantage when it comes to creating change. You can’t do it all by yourself! When I was 21 years old, I ran as an independent candidate for the Federal Senate of Australia. I loved the experience because it truly pushed me out of my comfort zone. I committed to going to a wide range of events with people I had never met before. Not only did it help during my campaign, but through the rest of my career and community work. The friendships I made, the organisations I came across, the people I connected with have held me in great stead.

When you’re building a team, it’s integral to know your strengths and find people who strengthen the group through different mindsets, skillsets and networks. They will challenge you and that’s a good thing! It can be an easy trap to bring together people who mirror your own strengths, instead, push yourself to bring together different people.

In these increasingly polarised times that we are living in, it can be all too easy to be revolted by people who hold different opinions and close down the conversations completely. Try to keep the avenue open.

4. Failure is part of the process

“If you’re not prepared to be wrong, you’ll never come up with anything original.”
– Ken Robinson

Plant many seeds as not all will grow. Failure is not a reflection of you, it’s just part of the process. For every project idea that’s been successful, there have been three ideas that have failed. Don’t be disheartened by this. Ask yourself, what can I learn from this? The learnings might come years afterwards too.

See the obstacles not as a sign to stop but a sign to keep going! Embrace them. Rise to the challenge of them. Obstacles will only make you stronger so keep in there!

5. Cultivate your skills in learning, listening and leadership

If you want to make a positive impact on the world, here are three key skills – learning, listening and leadership. Since the very beginning of my journey, I’ve been honing these skills. I still get it wrong and there is still much opportunity for improvement!

Learning – you are also learning! Learning about the complex problems we are facing in society, how we can make a positive impact, how we can work together more effectively. Being a learner.

Listening – the greatest leaders I have observed are all incredible listeners. They listen for what is said, they listen for what is not said. They don’t just listen, they connect and see the world through the eyes of the speaker. Often, when we have ideas and knowledge, we can be too quick to talk all the time. A great leader sees the opportunity to ask questions and listen. They listen with great humility.

Leadership – be ready to learn more about yourself, your team, your community and society and uncover the assumptions and biases that may hold you back. This self awareness helps you to start building mastery in leadership. You will need it when you need to bring together a diverse group with a common vision, when you need to have a courageous conversation with a team member and when you get knocked down by failures.

6. Surround yourself with the people, places and beauty that inspires you

When I feel inspired, I feel like I can do anything. So I think deeply about what inspires me the most. I wonder about the times that inspire fresh thinking, innovative ideas and connections.

For me, it’s about people, places and creativity. I surround myself with inspiring people. I meet with them. I read their books. I listen to their videos and podcasts. I attend events that push my knowledge and networks and am inspired by the incredible people I get to meet. I’m also inspired by our beautiful natural environment, the blue oceans, the tall trees and the animals who inhabit these spaces. Art, creativity, music and movement also inspire me. I love different art forms and the creativity and dedication it takes to create.

What gives you energy? Take your inspiration seriously.

7. Focus on what you’ve achieved, not what’s still to be done

“Real change, enduring change, happens one step at a time.”
– Ruth Bader Ginsburg

This is an important one! When change is the goal, you can be so future focused that you don’t acknowledge your achievements along the way. And let’s face it, we often have big hopes and dreams! Don’t get disheartened that there is still so much to do, celebrate what you have achieved along the way – highlight it, the small wins, make them visible to all the team. Change, at the best of times, is slow but that doesn’t mean that you don’t celebrate the wins along the way. Sometimes change happens in a giant leap, most of the time it will be incremental. Stick with your goals and purpose for the long term and don’t forget to take the time to acknowledge what you have achieved.

Together we can effect real change, by joining together, sharing our talents and envisioning a better future. Often I reflect on my 12 year old self, who had their eyes opened by the possibilities of this. No matter what we face as a world or society, I try to remember this. Now I have children of my own who see the issues they would like to positively impact and I know it’s my turn to encourage them to see their role as a changemaker in society.

Here’s to another 25 years of changemaking impact.

 

Get this Free Guide: 6 POWERFUL SECRETS TO FIND YOUR HIGHEST PURPOSE IN LIFE

The world needs more purpose-driven people. But where do you start? This inspiring guide will give you powerful insights to find and refine your own purpose in life.
  • This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged.

Break out of your comfort zone to improve your confidence

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Have you ever done something that has surprised you? Perhaps you met with a mentor that you’d been hoping to talk to. Or presented a speech for the first time. Maybe you took on a project that’s a bit out of your job description? And you realized that you pushed the boundaries and moved out of your comfort zone?

Ahh comfort zones – they are warm and cushy. And as creatures of comfort, we love sitting in these pockets. But does it challenge us, help us grow, and improve our confidence? Short answer, no. One of the most effective ways to improve your self-confidence is to regularly push yourself out of your comfort zone.

In the book, The Tools, psychotherapists Phil Stutz and Barry Michels share research-backed strategies for people to overcome the internal barriers holding them back from success. These practical steps allow anyone to reach their full potential.

Tool #1 – Reversal of desire

The first tool in the book is the Reversal of Desire. It explains that your areas of growth lie just outside of your comfort zone. Yes that’s right, just outside of your comfort zone!

Your comfort zone feels great because it’s a state where your brain perceives very little risk. You’re in a familiar, safe situation. Changing habits, learning new skills, trying new things, and other self-improvement activities are all unfamiliar. You have to get out of your comfort zone to do them.

Stepping outside your comfort zone is stressful, but research shows that our brains need to feel slight to moderate anxiety to improve. Psychologists refer to this as “optimal anxiety” — the level of stress that compels you to take action.

Deadlines are helpful for understanding this. If you’re like most people and you’re given six weeks to do a project, initially you’re not worried at all. You feel like you have a ton of time and don’t push yourself to be optimally productive for the first couple of weeks. However, once you’re a week or two away, the stress of potentially not meeting the deadline becomes a weight on your shoulders that pushes you to excel despite tiredness and any other barriers you face.

Be strategic about your comfort zone!

The key is to be strategic about how and when you step outside your comfort zone, ensuring that your anxiety does not overwhelm you. For example, if you’re terrified of public speaking, don’t start by volunteering to speak at a big community event. Instead, start with small groups to build your confidence and work your way up.

It’s like a muscle. The more you push your boundaries, the easier the optimal anxiety will feel to you. It’s like you will broaden the boundaries of your own comfort zone.

This feeling of nervousness brings on our sense of flow. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi is a psychologist who wrote the book, Flow. He describes ‘flow’ as a mental state of complete absorption in the current experience. When we are fully engaged and challenged by a task.

“The best moments in our lives are not the passive, receptive, relaxing times… The best moments usually occur if a person’s body or mind is stretched to its limits in a voluntary effort to accomplish something difficult and worthwhile.”
– Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi

Here’s a challenge (or two) for you

Write down 10 things that challenge you or make you feel fearful. Public speaking? Getting feedback? Introducing yourself to new people? Choose one of these areas to focus on. Brainstorm a range of activities to step out of your comfort zone and practice them in small but consistent ways. Remember your areas of growth lie just outside of your comfort zone! Try ten ways to practice this challenge – yes, not just once, but ten! Repetition is the only way you’re going to move outside your comfort zone to take on these challenging activities.

Moving out of your comfort zone doesn’t always have to be work related either – you could listen to unfamiliar music, read a magazine that you would never normally pick up, try a different hobby with a friend, go to a different restaurant. Get into the habit of pushing your areas of comfort. Reflect on what you learn about yourself in the process.

Final words

Don’t let the fears in your head stop you from trying new things and stepping up in your growth. Take the smallest steps forward and you might just surprise yourself!

 

Want to join the Greater Good Collective? Launching 1 May

On 1 May, I’m launching the Greater Good Collective, a 3 month personal leadership journey to live and lead courageously to create a better world.

Check it out here to join us.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Get this Free Guide: 6 POWERFUL SECRETS TO FIND YOUR HIGHEST PURPOSE IN LIFE

The world needs more purpose-driven people. But where do you start? This inspiring guide will give you powerful insights to find and refine your own purpose in life.
  • This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged.

Don’t be triggered

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We have all experienced a moment when your anger, annoyance or frustration has taken over and you’ve said something at a meeting that, on reflection, you wish you hadn’t. Has this happened to you? It’s definitely happened to me!

The reason these outbursts can happen to the best of us is simple psychology.

We all have a part of our brain that is responsible for our emotions—the limbic system—and another that is responsible for problem-solving, planning and consequential thinking—the frontal lobe. The amygdala is the part of the limbic system that makes you react instinctively to your emotions which is something humans have developed to avoid harm. Unfortunately, when we get angry, it is very easy for the amygdala to overpower the frontal lobe, leading us to have an outburst.

Clearly this reaction is not the best course of action, but in a moment of anger, annoyance or frustration, there is no reasoning! So how can we get past that initial instinct to react? Read on for a simple, yet effective strategy to banish that embarrassed, regretful feeling forever.

Consequential thinking is the antidote to mindless, reactionary behaviour that prevents people from reaching their leadership potential. It’s described as ‘evaluating the costs and benefits of your choices’ developed by Six Seconds, a not-for-profit organisation dedicated to improving the emotional intelligence of people.

How to practice consequential thinking

This model involves pausing for a few seconds, evaluating your situation and choosing to respond in a way that is best for you. In doing this, we are letting the instinct to react subside and allowing ourselves time to think.

Consequential thinking is about connecting your everyday behaviours to who you really want to be as a person and leader and to make choices every day that take you in the right direction.

Let’s break down those three steps.

1. Pause

Allow your emotion to occur without taking any action. For how long? Six seconds! Emotions are molecules and this is how long it takes for them to run their course in your brain and body before they are reabsorbed.

2. Evaluate

Question why you are feeling this way. What is the best possible result of your actions in this situation? How can you tailor your response to get to that result?

3. Choose your response

Respond now that you have thought through the consequences of your behaviour for yourself and others.

How can consequential thinking help you become a better leader?

1. Know your values

Consequential thinking forces you to clarify your values. What matters to you in life? Is it kindness, equality, connection or critical thinking? It can be daunting to acknowledge what you really value in your life and career, especially if it feels out of reach. However, this desire is something that will continuously motivate you and lead you to smarter decision-making.

Often when something annoys us, it is signalling something that is important to us. When we pause, we can think about what that important thing is that our emotion is pointing to. When you realise your values, it becomes much easier to see the consequences of your actions clearly. There is an obvious link between your behaviour and where it will lead you. Think about your actions over the past day, week or month. Do they align with your values?

2. Better relationships

Consequential thinking helps you enhance your relationships. Your behaviour as a professional
is what determines how others perceive you—whether they want to work with you or not.

Imagine someone in your team makes a mistake. As a leader you have two choices: react immediately or pause and calmly deliver constructive feedback. Think about which choice is more likely to prevent that mistake from happening again. Which choice is more likely to build a trusting, positive relationship?

Having positive professional relationships is beneficial for everyone: you won’t gain a reputation for having a bad temper and others will trust you more as a leader or a peer.

3. Dealing with challenging emotions

Consequential thinking helps you in those moments of explosive emotions. We all experience challenging emotions in difficult times from feelings of insecurity, to constant time pressures, to frustration and disappointment. No one gets to where they want to be without hard days and setbacks. What’s important is how you deal with the emotions that come along with these challenges.

Challenging emotions are inevitable. Once you reach the top of your field you are not suddenly immune to them. Luckily, they are a great guide if you know how to listen to them and act accordingly. You can apply consequential thinking–pausing for six seconds, remembering your values–to deal with challenging emotions. Holding your driving force in mind is a great way to better understand why you feel certain things.

When you pause to think about what is driving you, your values, you can better understand the anger and complete the task more efficiently. Having a better awareness of this emotion is going to allow you to deal with it properly, rather than letting it simmer and potentially blowing up at someone else.

In Summary

Consequential thinking is a key tool for your leadership toolbox. It challenges you to clarify what’s important to you, pause and act with consideration rather than being overtaken by challenging emotions and act with intention instead.

Warning – this strategy requires practice! Do you know where I find the better practice ground…with family. No one will know how to push your buttons better than your three-year-old son or your loving little sister! Yes, practicing this technique is not just limited to the workplace but can be used at home too.